


Feverish

by Anonymous



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Angst, Bisexuality, Blow Jobs, Coming of Age, Crying, Homophobia, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Pre-Canon, Sports Metaphors, Teen Romance, basically a ton of headcanons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-01
Updated: 2016-12-01
Packaged: 2018-09-03 16:20:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8720503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Victor and Georgi were opposites on the ice. Fate and sport made them rivals. By chance, the two began to nurture feelings that went beyond their rivalry and  the masks they used in front of the cameras, nourishing a fever that could only be satiated with each other's presence. What made this difficult, however, was the beautiful and cold world of figure skating that created athletes with glass hearts.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Febril](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8609686) by Anonymous. 



> So, yeah, I translated my Georgi/Victor oneshot to English :'D Or GeoVi, as I like to call this ship. Maybe Poporov? Does this ship even has a name??? Who knows!!
> 
> This work is totally pre-canon, and they're both teenagers; also, considering the time this was written, I took the liberty to put a ton of headcanons for these two boys, and I had to admit this was way too fun. Who am I kidding, I love writing about cute teenage boys falling in love, I sure do.
> 
> And by cute, I really mean it. They're ADORABLE. I actually teared up at some times because they're too precious haha
> 
> If canon goes against what's here in the future (which it probably will lmao), just read this thinking of it as some sort of alternate timeline lol
> 
> Please enjoy this fic!

 

Victor Nikiforov had long silver hair. He used to skate with it tied in a ponytail, and they perfectly matched his movements - always graceful - with a mesmerizing fluidity. When he performed the spins, the long strands always followed him behind, and during the jumps, they seemed to take just a little longer to get back down on the landing.

His movements on the ice were absurdly beautiful, a grace rarely seen in humans. His footwork, the positioning of his arms, the flexibility of his body, even the way he moved his fingers were simply flawless. Victor always worked hard, but he also possessed pure talent, a natural affinity for skating-it was as if the blades of the skates were a natural extension of his body.

Georgi Popovich wanted to be like him, but fate made him his opposite. He was still good at skating, but he knew he didn’t have Victor's natural talent; nor his posture automatically elegant, his ease to learn, his long, light hair - Georgi's was black and cut short, a night sky - or even his smile, so captivating.

Not even their eyes had the same hue. Victor's were light blue and warm, inviting like the ice of a skating rink or even a lake. Meanwhile, Georgi had darker eyes, which resembled not the surface of a frozen lake but the deep, mysterious waters beneath it.

That was a good way to represent them as they were, ever since the competitions in the junior category. Victor was the clear and radiant beauty, the one that captivated everyone and robbed the center of attention, leaving Georgi always behind in his shadow.

Like the waters of a frozen lake, Georgi was always there, but never enough to be noticed. People rarely stopped to watch him, and even when they did, he was hardly as commended as his counterpart; And just as the cold waters always touched the ice but didn’t break it until it melted, Georgi was close enough to Victor to appreciate his beauty, but never enough to actually have it for himself.

He didn't want to be like Victor - his goal was to surpass him.

As much as they've known each other since they started competing in the junior category, Georgi and Victor only really started talking after their first season in the senior category. It was the beginning of May, and they were both sixteen - not so recent anymore, considering that both celebrated their birthdays in December, with Victor being only one day older.

Spring made the streets colorful, trees blossomed and gave more life to the old buildings; however, the two teenagers didn’t have as much free time to enjoy such a landscape, occupying themselves not only with their respective studies but also spending as much time as possible on the skating rink. As much as they studied in different places, the routine was the same - class, training, home, without much change.

Sometimes they exchanged words, but they were just banalities. Usually greetings and goodbyes, educated questions about how the classes of the day were, nothing very interesting.

Still, some subjects were implicitly forbidden to the two boys. When the coach spent hours praising Victor for shortly after speaking few positive phrases for Georgi, they exchanged embarrassed looks - Victor from pity, Georgi of dissatisfaction. During the warm-ups and stretches, it was apparent how much puberty was changing their bodies, and none of them dared to admit that flexibility was going away, and that performing certain spin positions became an increasingly painful and arduous task.

That afternoon in May, the ice was wetter and slipperier than usual, but that didn’t stop them from putting on their skates and going to practice. In a few months the seasons would change, and before they noticed, the new season of competitions would begin again. And by then, they needed to take the time to prepare and refine their programs, no matter how much it meant sacrificing the time they could spend enjoying their teenagehood.

Not that they did not know it - the athlete's life demanded sacrifices, and that was just one of them.

Talking about their respective personal sacrifices was also a matter out of the question.

At one point, Georgi decided to try to perform a toe loop. He was confident, and had already tried other jumps before without much difficulty. His speed was good, and after a few moments of concentration, he let the toe pick touch the ice, scratching it and lifting him up into the air.

In a few seconds, however, something went wrong at the moment of landing. The blade did not touch the ice the right way - maybe his body had turned too far - and he quickly fell, sliding into the cold, wet ice.

He gasped in surprise, but it didn’t call much attention there, considering that falls were inevitable. Even the skater didn’t care that much about it at first, since it was humanly impossible for him to nail all of his jumps; even the best skaters, like Victor and all the other older professionals had their bad days and their shameful falls.

What caught the attention of the others present was the fact that the moment he tried to get up, his foot gave way and he fell again, feeling pain in the area - and it was not long before he realized that his fall was worse than he thought, enough to hurt the foot he used to land.

"Georgi! Are you okay? "The coach screamed as soon as he realized that the teenager could not get up with the same ease and agility as before, his voice filled with concern. Not that he was guilty in that sense, but the more accidents that could be avoided, the better.

"I sprained my ankle..." Georgi replied, moving slowly to sit down on a little more dignified on the floor. His hands were wet, and he didn’t know whether to blame the ice or his own neglect - or perhaps none of that, which used to be the right choice for that kind of situation.

"I'm going to take you to the infirmary." Whoever said that was not the coach or any of the other skaters there, but Victor. The boy looked at him worriedly, and in a few moments he skated until he was by his side.

Seen from the bottom like that, Victor looked even more professional and superior. Yet he maintained an elegant posture, clearly respectful and at the same time mysterious; which made Georgi wonder if he had any specific reason to want to help him that was beyond mere camaraderie with his sports partner.

"No, Victor, you don’t have to..." The answer came out automatically, as much as he knew he did, in fact, need help, and yes, his foot was throbbing with pain. However, his own pride spoke louder, which only made the situation a little more embarrassing.

Not that Victor actually seemed to care, since he showed no sign of being surprised by that phrase.

"Please. There's no way you can walk alone right now." That was true, and this time Georgi managed to keep himself quiet as Victor leaned closer, his hand extended, palm open, fingers gentle, inviting.

"Hold my hand." At the same moment the fallen skater did as he was told, and though Victor had seemingly delicate hands, his handhold was firm, with a mixture of gentleness and strength that made him able to help him and soon they slowly skated away from the rink and walked up to the infirmary, where Victor led him to a place where he could sit down.

The infirmary was empty, were it not for both of them. But that was a place where all the athletes had access, and they already knew where to find the medicines and whatever else they need to take care of basic injuries.

"Is it hurting a lot?" Victor's voice was soft, and right after he got everything he needed to help the other teenager, he sat down beside him, pulling his hair off his shoulder. Georgi was lost for a moment observing that simple gesture - the other boy was certainly very handsome, even without the typical make-up he wore in competitions - but then nodded as he put his leg on his lap to undo the Knot of the tie.

Victor realized that the boy was having a hard time taking off the skating boot, so he soon let his hands rest on his, in a request that he might help. Georgi did not protest, accepting and letting Victor take off his footwear, slowly, stopping now and then to see if it was all right with him.

They didn’t exchange a single word, but at that moment words were not necessary - it was as if they had known each other for a long time, as if the touch of Victor's slim fingers were old acquaintances of Georgi, and as if that kind of touch was something inherently natural for both.

"Wow, that looks pretty bad... I do not think it would be good for you to work out more today." Victor said as Georgi removed his sock, showing his foot already with some old scars from the skating, but with a swollen ankle from the recent fall.

"It's not like I can balance myself without falling on my ass on the ice anyway." The comment was a little embarrassing - especially since the jump he missed was one of the simplest, and one of the first he learned when he started to skate seriously.

But instead of responding seriously, Victor actually laughed; His laughter was as beautiful as his voice, and the way the corners of his mouth curved upward made it all enough for Georgi to notice that it was a genuine smile and genuine laugh, unlike the ones he did just for show in front of the cameras.

"At least it already cushions the fall!" Georgi couldn’t be offended by that comment, and he had to admit he didn’t expect it - but it was exavtly the surprise that made it funny, and then he ended up laughing along with the other teenager, Leaving aside the fact that he had hurt himself for a few moments.

Georgi put the compress that Victor had left nearby in the swollen area, and for long seconds the silence settled in the infirmary.

"Hey, I'll be fine now. You can go back to skating if you want. "Georgi stated as he realized that this would probably lead nowhere, and also because he himself was beginning to feel embarrassed again. Victor seemed to have gotten lost in his own thoughts, so much so that he was staring at the ground, and had to blink a few times before actually answering it.

"I don’t want to leave you alone." It took the skater some time to realize the insinuation contained in his own words, and that was not really his intention. But it was true: he didn’t want to leave the other teenager alone.

Victor never said it, but he had a certain interest in Georgi. The boy was a good skater, and it hurt when people didn’t want to acknowledge his efforts just because they skated together; At various times Victor wanted to ask people to look more closely and affectionately at his opponents and not just him, but he knew that such a statement would not be seen very well in the media.

Georgi did not seem intimidated by it, though. He was not willing to give up on skating, and Victor realized how much the boy seemed to use that situation as a motivation to keep going, always training, always drawing his own clothes for the programs - he had seen his sketchbook once, stuffed with beautiful models - always giving the best in his programs and actually incorporating the characters he sought to represent on the ice.

Victor admired Georgi, because he knew that if his roles were reversed, he would have given up a long time ago.

"It's not that I don’t think you're going to be okay, that’s not it ... It's just that it must be pretty boring to be alone in such a situation, right? Besides ... "It was not common for Victor to hesitate in his words, but that situation was somewhat different from the conventional one. When he was in front of the cameras, the boy already knew what to say, how to smile, even how to look at who was doing the interview or taking pictures. However, at that moment he was not being interviewed by anyone, and so he did not know which words to use or which tone of voice would be ideal so that he could communicate fully with Georgi.

His heart was pounding-and it was strange considering that, minutes earlier, they were doing so well without needing much verbal communication.

"Besides?" The other skater insisted, genuinely curious. He did not remember ever seeing Victor making his more natural, more adolescent, more human side clear-not that way, not directly to him.

He remembered having seen it from afar, and he never dared to try to approach for fear of interfering with the privacy the other athlete deserved. Even when they celebrated their birthdays together with one same party, each one stayed with their circle of acquaintances, failing to actually talk about something deeper than the birthday vows made purely for education.

And now there was Victor, alone and human, shy, trying to start a conversation with him.

It was mysterious and fascinating, just as it was to observe him in competitions.

"I dom’t remember of I ever really talked to you, Georgi. And we train together, compete together... I think it’d be nice to know you more, you know, since you're the only one here at my age." In fact, they were the only skaters who practiced there that had the same age. It was even strange to see that they weren’t close, especially because it would be natural for them to understand the anguish of adolescence - that and because of how they were devoted to their sport.

"Well, that's true. But you're the real star, Victor. You’re handsome and charismatic, people love you. Making friends shouldn’t be too difficult for you. "What Georgi said was never a lie. Victor was stupidly beautiful, and had a natural charisma that greatly helped him to do well in situations where he needed to have a certain level of social control.

He knew how to act, even because he had been trained to do so. Georgi too - it was not like the cameras had never filmed him. However, Victor was always one of the most beloved, and for that he needed to maintain a good pose all the time.

It was tiring. He wanted friendships that made him comfortable enough for him to relax and be just a kid like any other; And certainly Georgi must have had this kind of desire as well, even though he didn’t show it.

It was natural, after all. They were two of a kind.

"Not much, but... I think it’d be nice to be friends with someone with an experience closer to mine, don’t you think so?" Victor didn’t have to say much more than that for Georgi to understand what he wanted to get through the lines. Now his intentions were really clear - and the skater couldn’t really blame him for thinking that way.

They were still young. They should be closer, they should try to understand each other before time separates them in their natural course. And none of them deserved to be a solitary skater with no one to trust.

"Oh okay. I think I get what you mean. "Georgi tried to smile to make Victor a little more comfortable, and the other boy returned the gesture. At that moment the mood was lighter, and the two young boys relaxed - especially Georgi, who was beginning to feel better after resting.

"Hey Georgi, since we're the same age, we probably study the same things, right?" That question was rather sudden, but it was logical, and Victor did it with a certain twinkle in the eyes that made the boy curious.

"I guess so." He nodded, thinking that Victor probably just wanted to ask him what his school should be like - and to be honest, it wasn’t very interesting and certainly not very different from Victor’s, but it wasn’t like they could start a friendship without even knowing the basic things about each other than those related to the world of figure skating.

"What do you think of us meeting to study together? We can help each other. And we can go out to eat together, visit each other's houses, things like that. You know, like..." The young man got lost in his words again, but now it was easier for Georgi to know how to complete his phrase.

"Friends." That word was simple but full of meaning, and Victor found himself pausing for a deep breath when he heard Georgi saying it loud and clear. That idea still seemed different and new to the two skaters, but it was starting to gain some form - and now that Georgi had said that, it seemed even more official.

Friends. They were starting to be friends.

"Yup! As friends. And not just skaters, even though we’re that, too." Victor commented with a shy chuckle, and Georgi couldn’t help noticing the slight blush on his nose and cheeks - even the young skating king could get a little embarrassed, after all.

"That's not a bad idea." The other teenager said shortly afterwards, when he realized that maybe he was staring way too much at Victor's face - which might be making him uncomfortable, but also was making his heart pound just a little stronger in his chest.

At that moment, however, Georgi interpreted this as a mere sign of anxiety. That day turned out to be different than he expected, and a new direction in his life was about to start.

Little did the two boys know the weight of that little conversation-informal, shy, and subtle, full of young curiosity-in the infirmary on a spring day.

Victor was good at physics and used his own sport to understand the formulas and how to use them. Georgi remembered the first time he took the notes of the other boy to copy them, finding everything extremely organized and in perfect handwriting, different from his that was somewhat confusing from time to time. Contrary to expectations, Victor did well with what was concrete, with numbers and calculations, with chemical formulas, and the periodic table - things Georgi did not quite understand, for he preferred the abstract.

Georgi wasn’t good with numbers, but he liked history, art, reading and interpreting the words of others in his own way. He had a good eye for color, dirty fingers with pen ink for sketching in the corners of the notebook in the middle of class, and the last pages were devoted to random scribbles and quotes from songs and books he liked - from the classics to the most modern . He made outlines in his notes, flowcharts full of arrows that linked to key words, with notes written in small handwritting in the corners so as he’d not forget what he meant later.

Both supplied their respective weaknesses, explaining the subjects they had difficulty with and exchanging exercises and papers full of texts before training. Little by little, it became routine, and soon they were meeting even on weekends and holidays to study together - and when they were finished, they’d go out on the streets of St. Petersburg, laughing at the pigeons flying as they approached as if by any chance the two skaters were some kind of a threat.

One thing the two boys had in common was the taste for photography. Sometimes their fun was to walk alongside the Neva River, make their way through the subway stations of the city, explore the more traditional neighborhoods, take pictures of the ancient and imposing architecture while talking about what they liked to watch on TV, humming along to random songs - Victor discovered that Georgi had an incredibly nice voice, overcoming him in that regard -, stopping every now and then for a sandwich or a hot chocolate together.

Over the months, the two boys got closer and closer, and both discovered more about how each one was behind the mask they used publicly as athletes.

Victor was, in fact, a cheerful and friendly person, but his sense of humor could be even more eccentric than what he used to show in front of the cameras. The love he had for his dog was almost parental, and he lived with a picture of the pet in his wallet. He liked sunny days the most, along with spring and flower crowns, but he was scared to death of bees and always hid behind Georgi whenever one flew by. He had a chemistry kit at home, where he liked to experiment whenever free time allowed hom to do so.

Georgi liked to spend hours in the museum, was interested in space and meteor showers. He used to draw as a child, and always carried pencils and paper with him - in times of solitude, they were his friends, or a good book. He found the concept of magic something fascinating, and his eyes glistened when he watched fantasy movies. He collected feathers of birds, but would never have the guts to create one - he would be unable to keep any animal trapped in a cage.

All those little bits of information and curiosities helped the boys to see each other better, to know each other, get closer to the ground than the media put them. Yes, they were both skaters - and high-level ones considering their age - but they were also people with their tastes, hobbies and fears.

The more they knew each other, the more interested they were in each other. Gradually they plunged deeper and deeper into their respective universes, and before they knew it, the throbbing of their hearts and the smiles that they exchanged when they first saw each other became increasingly strong and overwhelming - to the point Of eventually taking care of their thoughts even when they were apart.

It was as if they had both fallen ill with a fever, and the only possible treatment was the constant companionship of each other.

One afternoon, Victor went to visit Georgi's house. The boy was alone - his parents had left home, promising to come back later - but that didn’t stop him from offering Victor a cup of tea in the kitchen.

The two of them talked until they forgot about the tea, and it cooled down, but they didn’t bother about it at all.

"Ah, yes, Georgi. There's one thing I wanted to ask you a while ago, but I always forget! "Victor suddenly exclaimed shortly after finishing his tea - cold but still delicious - and Georgi only raised his eyebrow at it.

"What is it, then? Better tell me now before it's too late again." The boy took the opportunity to playfully poke at him with a laugh that was accompanied by Victor's. Now that they were much closer, little taunts like that were already allowed.

"It's about your drawings. You like to draw clothes, don’t you? Including figure skating costumes, right? "Georgi wondered why Victor took so long to question him about this, when he'd already told him he liked to draw and did it as a hobby; having even shown some random drawings and scribbles, especially in the notebooks he used in class.

The curiosity in Victor's clear eyes, however, was lovely, and he knew he had no way he’d be able to give a negative answer to the boy.

"Yeah. My family has a strong bond with sewing, so I became interested in it pretty early, I guess." He replied, not hiding the slightly proud smile on his face. Georgi liked to admit that his family had been sewing for generations, and as much as he had no obligation to keep the tradition alive, being born and raised amid machines, fabrics and models made him naturally passionate about such an art - and it certainly influenced him in various aspects.

"So you know how to sew?" Victor asked, looking even more surprised, and his expression showed that he was not only in awe but also that he had found that information pretty much incredible - and the way his mouth was open in what looked like a heart was certainly lovely.

"I’m learning. I know a little, actually. There are some of my clothes that I sewed myself… You never noticed?" For Georgi, it was easy to differentiate the clothes he sew from those made by other, more experienced people, and the ones he bought in stores. But for someone who didn’t pay much attention and didn’t know much about sewing, it must be difficult in most cases.

"Oh, really? So you mean you can sew your own costumes?" He surely wished, but that was still far too complex for him; skating costumes are expensive and complex, and need special attention when choosing fabrics - they need to be elastic enough to withstand all the movement and detailed choreographies, and at the same time sturdy so as not to tear easily with the falls, and there’s also all the job of adding all the little details by hand. That's why Georgi was content with his drawings, at least for now.

"This part I think is still very complex for me, but I can draw them, at least. And, well, if you want I can draw some for you, if you don’t mind. "He suggested, already wondering what kinds of costumes would fit Victor well- everything, probably.

The other teenager's eyes practically shone as soon as he heard it, and instantly something that sounded like an absurdly cheerful noise came out of his mouth before he was able to form humanly understandable syllables.

"Of course! I’d love you to! Thank you, thank you!" Victor thanked him, coming up to hug Georgi, laughing and stroking his hair - and in the midst of all his joy, he ended up letting his lips touch the other boy's, sealing them in an innocent kiss, but still full of meaning.

The kiss caught Georgi by surprise, and he let out a muffled exclamation, but he did not try to push the other boy away. He actually liked that contact, even if suddenly, but he couldn’t return it because a few moments later Victor realized what he had done and walked away, his nose and cheeks flushed together along with a look in his eyes that was a mixture of surprise and concern.

"Oh, I'm sorry ... I wasn’t thinking straight, Georgi, I ..." The young man tried to hide his face behind his long hair, staring embarrassed at Georgi - and that sight, along with the previous event, only served to make him want to push the silver locks away and kiss him again.

However, he didn’t do that - the confusion was clear in Victor's gaze, and Georgi was also somewhat embarrassed by it, considering the warmth in his cheekbones that must have been as red as the other boy's.

"No need to apologize. It's okay... It wasn’t bad." He said, being totally honest. Victor blinked a few times, brushing his hair away from the front of his face, revealing flushed cheeks and parted lips before speaking again.

"It really wasn’t, but ... Is everything okay?" The boy asked quietly, still a little awkward. He was really ashamed to have kissed Georgi in an impulsive act, especially since he didn’t even know if the other skater would react well; but fortunately he was being very considerate and understanding at the time - which only served to make Victor even more embarrassed.

"Yup. We can still be friends, it's not like a kiss will change that ... Unless you want it to, of course. If you know what I mean. "Georgi felt his face burn with embarrassment as he finished speaking, and at that moment he wished he had long hair like Victor's so he could hide his face in it - and he was fighting his own instincts to not do it with his hands, as he still wanted to see Victor's reaction.

The skater was silent, and for long seconds Georgi swore in his mind, thinking that he shouldn’t have made that insinuation, and that it would be better to keep it to himself, until he finally heard Victor's soft voice.

"Do you like boys?" The question was unexpected, but it certainly wasn’t bad considering the moment. Georgi giggled nervously, scratching the nape of his neck, then responding.

"I like you. So yeah, I think so. But I like girls too. Both are good."He shrugged, looking down shortly afterwards. Georgi always liked girls, but lately, as puberty hit him, he realized that he also had feelings for people of the same gender - something he never told anyone about, and that he was therefore confessing for the first time to someone else: Victor, in that case.

And Victor was a boy, one he liked way too much and who smiled sincerely at his answer.

"Well, I think the same... So you mean we can go deeper? Not just a friendship, but..." Again, his habit of not finishing the sentences when he was nervous appeared, and as much as Georgi was embarrassed by that situation, he couldn’t help himself to complete it.

"Dating? Yes. But it's not good for other people to know, you know how things are... But it's not like we need to tell anyone about it, right?" All of this was certainly a relief to the teenager, who was thinking about it for a long time already - how much exactly was a mystery, but he knew that it was quite intense.

Victor came back to him, placing a hand gently on his face. His fingers stroked his cheek, and he chuckled softly as one of them passed right under his nose. The tips  went over his mouth, drawing the outlines of his lips, and at that moment the skater smiled genuinely.

He wanted to date Georgi. He wanted to have that boy by his side, wanted to know even more about him, wanted to share everything with him - good and bad experiences, both inside and outside skating.

"Yeah! As long as we're together, that's enough." As soon as he finished speaking, Georgi smiled, and a few seconds later, naturally, the two of them approached to exchange a second kiss - slower, sweeter, and now really official.

Keeping a secret relationship as an athlete was exhausting, but the two boys didn’t give up on their hopes of spending time together despite the training - increasingly intense, now that the new competitive season was approaching and the weather was getting colder, forcing people to wear more and more layers of clothing on the streets - and the pressure from the media, which was coming back especially to Victor.

Whenever they could, they would go out together, even if it meant they couldn’t do anything really bold and be careful about the contact they kept in public - it was important that people didn’t suspect, so they kept their kisses, hand holding and the most affectionate looks for the moments when they were alone in their homes or in more reserved places.

Even so, as Victor well affirmed, only the fact that they were together helped quite a lot when it came to deal with such frustration. They were still studying together, but now they exchanged little messages each time they borrowed each other's notes-  and Victor loved to make puns with physics that made Georgi laugh and hide his face in his hand at the same time, slightly embarrassed.

They also started to train more together, whether in ballet, races, stretching, and - especially - in skating. Now that they have entered the senior category, only triple jumps would not be enough to guarantee them good scores: they needed to train quadruples, increase the energy for the programs, increase the difficulty of the technical elements to stay on the same level as their older and more experienced opponents.

As much as they were rivals in several competitions, they did not fail to represent the same country - so they had to chase after the lost time of the previous years when they weren’t that close. That, and also because it was a good way to stay together without raising suspicions of other people about their relationship; after all, in that context, on the rink, they were just athletes helping each other.

Georgi designed the costumes for his programs and Victor's programs, including the exhibition ones. When he saw the boyfriend using the models he first designed - which were incredible after being passed from paper to the real fabrics, in the hands of someone much more competent than he was in terms of sewing - he had to restrain himself from jumping on top of the other boy, for the clothes matched perfectly with him.

With the start of the competitive season, free time soon ended. The routine now consisted of even more constant workouts and training time, long plane rides, nights spent on cold ice rinks as they both tried to score only the best grades. It was tiring and stressful, but at the same time the feeling of making a good show, getting a good grade, and hearing the applause of the audience certainly made the effort worthwhile.

It was not long before Victor got his first gold medal this season, along with bouquets and a crown of blue flowers on his head. That night, Victor seemed not like a person but an angel, a creature much more than human who perfectly controlled the blades at his feet, the rotations of his jumps, the drawings he made on the ice.

It was absurd. Georgi knew that he’d never be able to skate on that level and seem to have come out of one of his fantasy stories that he so fondly loved - as an angel, as a prince, as a noble warrior who always won his battles and saved the entire kingdom from the forces of evil. Maybe one day he might try to play one of these roles, but at that moment he - and the whole world - had eyes only for Victor.

Equally unforgettable was, however, what happened on one of the nights of his free skating during that season. Georgi was nervous, his body trembling under his own outfit and his jacket. He had somehow managed to stay in the top 3 of the short program, and would be one of the last to skate that night - that is, he would have plenty to look forward to, and the other skaters would have several chances to overtake him.

Early in the evening, Victor signaled for him to get closer, then grabbed at his wrist, as his hand would be too suspicious, and guided him discreetly away from the rink, circling the empty corridors. The boy followed him, knowing that whatever the other skater had in mind, it must be something good, or at least enough to distract him from his anxious thoughts that sought to review every step, every move, every leap and spin of his program.

He didn’t expect to be taken to one of the bathroom booths further away from the rink- and thus empty - with Victor coming in with him and locking the door, leaving them stupidly close.

"I'm sorry about the place... But, well, I wanted to make you more relaxed before your turn and I needed a reserved place..." Victor's hands reached his shoulders, and Georgi just murmured a "okay" before they kissed. It was something they both liked to do, but they didn’t always had the privacy or time to do it.

Unlike the first kisses they exchanged at the beginning of their relationship, the two now knew how to please each other - how to open their mouths, the way they should let their tongues touch, in no hurry, the right way to let their hands run through each other's bodies.

Georgi's fingers pressed the back of Victor's head into a muffled murmur - in return, the other skater pressed against his boyfriend's waist, taking his body even closer. Georgi was surprised by the bold move, but it was distracting him from his anxiety, and he deepened the kiss as he delighted in the proximity of their bodies.

When Victor tried to move against his boyfriend, rubbing himself against him, Georgi shivered. They had already begun to advance a little more in their relationship, doing so during the moments they had both the privacy and energy enough for it. However, in that public place, the adrenaline also took control of the skater, who moved away from the kiss to be able to look at his boyfriend.

"Wouldn’t you like to keep going when we get to the hotel?" He asked softly, trying to ignore the fact that Victor's hand, which stopped at his thigh, was making his body increasingly warm - especially between his legs.

"Of course. But I can give you a little treat here, don’t you think?" The boy replied, smiling provocatively, and Georgi's heart rate quickened. He wondered what the boyfriend meant by that, and it wasn’t long before his youthful mind started to try figuring out what the answer would be - after all, they were only two seventeen years old teenagers now, together in a relatively private place, full with hormones and curiosity.

He’d be lying if he said that he didn’t want to know what Victor was insinuating at that moment - and also knew that the other boy wouldn’t force him to anything if he denied the offer.

That place was dangerous for such a thing, but as long as they were quick and didn’t make too much noise, they wouldn’t attract anyone's attention. In addition, the first group still had some skaters to perform, so the break would take quite some time to arrive - and at that point it would be dangerous to try anything in the bathrooms, which would be filled with people. If they were to take such a risk, that was the right time for it.

"Yes, yes ... Just be quick. If anyone catches us here..." Victor stopped him by putting his index finger over his lips, and at that moment Georgi realized that just chattering would only slow things down.

"I know. Just help me and relax." The skater murmured before locking his mouth into his again, starting a kiss even more lascivious than the previous one. His hands moved over Georgi’s hip and thighs - these very well worked -, provoking him; considering how he was moving around, it was working out pretty well.

At one point, Victor let one hand slip between the legs of the other boy, groping over the black pants he was wearing for his presentation. The volume of his erection was starting to make itself felt, despite the tension of being in a small public bathroom booth, in a sign that he was really doing his best to relax despite the possibility - albeit minute - of the two getting caught.

Georgi let out a sigh close to his boyfriend's ear to encourage him to continue, and in response Victor pressed his hand harder against Georgi’s cock over the clothing. At that moment, the boy thanked his pants for being dark - it would be embarrassing if he dirtied it before the time of his program and people saw it. However, it was best not to think too much about possible media scandals and focus on the fact that Victor was trying to make him feel good.

When he thought the other boy was about to put his hand inside his pants so he could feel his flesh directly, he bent down, kneeling in front of him.

So that was what Victor was insinuating.

"Don’t you want to just use your hand?" Georgi asked, feeling rather embarrassed suddenly when he saw his boyfriend in that position just below him. It was strange, new, and at the same time incredibly erotic - and he hadn’t even done much already.

Georgi wasn’t used to being over Victor, regardless of the situation. And he’d never have imagined that one day the time would come for him to see the best young Russian figure skater to kneel before him on his own free will, only to satisfy his carnal desires and distract him from his anxiety.

"No... But if you want, I can do that. It's for you to feel good, you know." Victor shrugged, casting up a sly look. It wasn’t the most comfortable position for him to hold out for long, but considering their inexperience, he didn’t think it would take long for his boyfriend to reach his limit.

Georgi took a deep breath, but he knew that if he denied it at the time, such a vision would be ingrained in his mind and would disrupt him even more during his skating. Or at least that was the excuse he was thinking, because at heart he was incredibly curious to continue.

"Hmn, in that case... Since you want it like this... Keep going. With your mouth." He stated, and as if to provoke him even more, Victor moved the long strands of his still loose fringe behind his ears.

"Your wish is an order. Just forgive me if my teeth get in the way." As soon as he finished saying that, he chuckled, then licked his lips and focused on what he planned to initially do with his boyfriend, who was just waiting in front of him.

His fingers moved to his black pants, which he opened carefully and patiently, for he could not mess up his clothes that night - at least not now. His clear eyes fixed on the volume in his underwear, now even more visible, before he lowered it just enough to expose his cock.

As soon as he did so, Georgi let out an embarrassed murmur, which Victor cherished with a smile and a naughty lick on his lips. The last thing he wanted was for his boyfriend to be too embarrassed to continue, especially since it would have an effect on him and his skating. Besides, it wasn’t as if he was undesirable - on the contrary, Victor found him to be quite attractive, to say the least.

Since he didn’t have the freedom for provocations, considering the increasingly scarce time, Victor began to masturbate him with one hand, already licking and sucking the glans, taking as much care as possible with the teeth. He wasn’t very experienced, but he had an idea of what to do to please his boyfriend.

Georgi soon had to cover his mouth with one hand, afraid to let out a loud groan that would tell what was happening in the cabin in case anyone was around. Though simple and unrefined, his boyfriend’s techniques were being effective in him, and he could only think about how stupidly attractive Victor was in that position, doing those perverted things.

Tired of doing just that one thing, Victor tried putting more of Georgi inside his mouth, taking as much care as possible so that his teeth wouldn’t scratch the sensitive region before he began to move his head, going as far as he could without choking and stimulating the part which he didn’t reach with his hand. Sometimes his teeth scratched a little against the skin, and at first he had a certain difficulty with it, but gradually he felt more secure to the point of being able to move his head at a steady pace.

Not that such small mistakes were to end the fact that Georgi was incredibly aroused. For him, everything his boyfriend did was new, and for this very reason he was holding himself so as not to make too much noise, besides the fear of being caught at that moment which was compromising at its best. Still, his free hand was on Victor's head, caressing his long, silver hair, tied in the typical ponytail.

From time to time the boy dared to look up, as if asking for his approval about what he was doing, and Georgi’s fingers stroked behind his ears as he drowned out the calls of Victor’s name. Even so, Victor could listen to them from time to time, and these served as a good incentive to continue - this and the fact that he was pulsing more and more into his mouth, certainly close to losing the control he struggled to maintain.

When Victor proceeded to suck him in more willingly, Georgi shivered. The way he was at that moment, he knew he wouldn’t be able to hold back for long, and Victor was doing his best just to make him give up on it.

He looked beautiful in that position, and Georgi, if he could, would take a picture to keep this memory alive forever. He wondered if Victor knew how much this affected him - in every way - and regardless of the answer, that didn’t make the situation any less arousing.

"Victor... I‘m coming..." He took his hand from the front of his mouth just to say that, then covered it again. He had almost forgotten to warn him about it, but he didn’t want to surprise Victor with that.

As soon as he heard that phrase, however, Victor only sucked him harder, not intending to get him out of his mouth; and moments later, Georgi lost control.

He came, his legs shaking more than ever and his hand holding Victor's long hair harder than before. His eyes closed, and it was impossible to hold the moans of relief and pleasure that escaped his throat at that moment, being muffled by the palm of his hand. For a moment, he asked himself if he’d be able to skate right or even keep his balance on the ice, because his legs in particular felt the impact of the orgasm in that position.

Even so, it was a great experience.

Victor swallowed what he could, but ended up spitting the rest of the come on a piece of toilet paper, wiping away the saliva that had run down the corners of his mouth. As he finished doing so, he stood up with a cheeky grin on his face, but Georgi could only notice the volume of his erection between his legs.

"Don’t you want me to help you with that too?" He questioned, pointing to the middle of his boyfriend's legs. Victor just shrugged, trying to pretend it wasn’t bothering him as much as much as it seemed.

"Not now. Don’t worry. Just come back before they think we ran out of the competition for the rest of the night or something. I'll show up later." Even though he smiled shortly afterwards, Georgi let out a sigh as he tidied up his own clothes, checking one last time to see if any suspicious spots were present - which fortunately wasn’t the case.

"Okay, alright..." Georgi didn’t want to leave his boyfriend alone like that, especially after what he did for him, but just as he respected all his wishes, Georgi respected Victor’s too - and if he said no, Georgi wouldn’t be the one to argue or try to force anything against his will.

"Hey, don’t be like this. Think that later you’ll get to return the favor at the hotel... And with no need to hurry." After saying this, Victor gave a little wink, and that little gesture was enough to make Georgi feel a little better, especially because he was right. In the hotel room, they’d both have privacy, a bed, and much more time to do as they pleased - and if Victor treated him so well in a public bathroom, then Georgi would make sure to love him as a god.

With that thought, he left the bathroom alone and returned to watch the other skaters performances, just to wait for his turn.

Surprisingly, he managed to finish with a silver medal that night, which was a much better result than expected - and which, he had to admit, made him quite proud. On the way back to the hotel, Victor commented on all the details that he liked best about his performance - the execution of each jump, the centralization of his spins, the choreography and the footwork in the quiet moments of the song.

As much as he didn’t find himself to be as praiseworthy when compared to his boyfriend, he thanked and accepted Victor’s compliments willingly, so he could reciprocate what happened to him earlier when they were finally alone in the room they were sharing during the trip.

They didn’t count the time they spent together, exploring each other's bodies with the same curiosity as they skated on a new rink. Their mouths uttered promises, passionate groans, syllables of their respective names uttered in different ways that would never be heard by the reporters who interviewed them after each competition.

Their fingernails clawed like blades of sharp skates, and their teeth marked the tender skin, like the toe picks that marked the ice at the moment of jumping. Victor let go of his hair, and Georgi uttered passionate oaths as he held his long locks and felt his scent mingled with their sweat.

He gripped and kissed the two skater's feet, covered with scars and marks of hard training from the last few years, as well as the rest of his body. The two of them locked themselves, arms and legs entwined, and stared into each other's eyes- Victor's frozen lake inviting the dark, silent waters of Georgi to take him to himself, not just once but several times, until they were tired and fell asleep together.

It was an unforgettable night for the two boys, who discovered carnal pleasure for the first time, and the vows made through marks on their skins, passionate glances, deep kisses, and the union of their bodies.

After the season was over and they went back to the routine of training and study, they realized that little by little the company alone was not enough to cure the fever they felt for each other.

What good would it do, after all, if they were able to meet each other when they didn’t have the freedom to smile as lovers, to be able to go out on but without the right to hold their hands, to exist as a couple for themselves but not for the others?

When they were alone, the two skaters tried to make the most of their time - kissing, exchanging caresses, trading passionate looks that would never be approved on the streets. Georgi and Victor knew that a case like theirs would be able to compromise their careers in skating if it went to public; they listened to the suspicious whispers from the trainers, saw the fear in the eyes of older athletes who certainly also hid their private affairs, heard the jokes and nicknames from commentarists.

It was suffocating.

Policing had to be constant, not only of themselves alone, but also of everything and everyone around them. When they were just friends, it was easy for the two to be content with long walks through the city, but now they wanted more - and that freedom, which they never had since they decided to make the skates an extension of their bodies, was denied more than ever.

Time passed, but they persisted longer, escaping when it was possible. On the night of Victor’s eighteenth birthday, they stayed up late in the hotel room where they were staying, taking advantage of the first hours of Georgi's eighteen years alone as well, in the midst of messy sheets, conversations on the porch with the moon and stars, and drinks stored in the fridge.

When possible, they exchanged physical oaths, bolder caresses, kisses in secret places for them to remember the bond they created and nurtured, albeit with small doses, every day.

Another season has passed, as well as another anniversary together. The two men were nineteen, celebrated at a party with several other skaters and influential people in the area - which means, no chance of the two having alone time as a couple. And as much as the two of them had fun with the other athletes who were also their friends, their need to interact not as friends or sports partners but as lovers was enormous.

It dominated their minds, their bodies, and especially their hearts. And even if they didn’t talk about it, it was clear that things were not going as well as they thought it would be at the time they exchanged the first timid kisses at Georgi's house when they were still blossoming with the innocent dreams when they were only sixteen.

After that season, one summer night, Victor decided to make an unexpected visit to Georgi. At dusk, he left the house, and made his own way to his boyfriend's house with only a backpack - the way they constantly visited each other, the skater was sure to be able to walk all the way blindfolded, simply because it was now natural to him.

The streets were deserted at that time, and Victor had more company with the animals that circulated in the streets in search of food in the trash than actual people. The wind swayed his long hair, which he let completely loose during the walk, no matter how hard the strands kept striking his face.

At that time, at least, there was no one to follow him and monitor every step of his - if he was eating according to his diet, if his weight was ideal, if he was doing the right exercise batteries, if he attended the ballet without fail. In those streets, during the silent and empty late night hours, only the stars could judge him, and even they didn’t bother to do it.

If he could, he would stop time right now, just so he’d get lost in that nick of time that barely seemed to exist forever. This way, he would be free.

But that would be no good without Georgi, who was the person he wanted - and needed - to see more than ever.

He didn’t want to wake up his boyfriend's parents, so he had to climb the tree by the side of the house until he reached the window of the other skater's room, which was on the first floor. Victor took advantage of the branches to help him, and then he came close enough to knock on the window once, twice, three times, insistently, to wake the young man who was sound asleep.

Georgi let out a sleepy grunt as he was awakened by the knocking on the window, and when he saw Victor standing outside, he wondered for a few seconds whether he was still asleep, and if that vision was the result of a dream of his. However, as soon as he noticed that he was awake and that this was really happening, he opened the window, staring at the man who was practically hanging on the branch - and who could have a very ugly fall from there.

"Victor! Did something happen? What do you want here at this hour?" Georgi asked as he helped him into his room, then closed the window again. He took his time, as well, to take a quick look at his boyfriend, who seemed physically right from head to toe.

He knew that Victor had an impulsive side, but in all those years climbing trees to get into someone's house in the middle of the night without warning wasn’t part of his eccentric repertoire. However, given the look the skater gave him and the way he left the backpack he was carrying on his back fall on the floor, he was also aware of the strangeness of his last actions.

"Georgi, I ... I need to ask a favor of you." Those words caught Georgi's attention even more, and he immediately wondered what kind of favor the other skater would leave home at that time to visit him - and even more without even ringing the front doorbell, something he could do with no problem at all, since he was not a stranger in that house.

"Can’t you wait until tomorrow? Do you know what time is it, Victor? Is it really that urgent?" He asked, scratching his eyes and looking at the clock on the bedside table. It would be long before the dawn of the next day, and they should surely be sleeping right now, along with practically the rest of the city.

Victor was playing with his fingers, and he quickly lowered his gaze to them before he had the courage to look into Georgi's eyes again - their blue seemed even deeper in the dark, his face lit only by the light of the moon that passed through the glass.

"I can wait, sure, but... I’d like you to help me now. Please." The man's voice failed for a moment, and Georgi understood that even if he could wait, it was important.

"And what would it be?" Georgi asked at once, not even realizing he was holding his breath before he spoke. That conversation was making him worried, and the way Victor seemed to be holding himself not to cry just made it clear that he wasn’t as well as he looked.

Georgi wanted to dry away all those tears that Victor insisted on holding.

"I want you to cut my hair. I want you to cut it short." The phrases hit Georgi like spears in his chest. Ever since he met the other man he never had short hair, and he himself clung to Victor's long, silver hair almost as if it was his own.

"What do you mean, Victor? Your hair looks great this way. It's beautiful... And you always liked it like that." Victor knew that. He was very proud of his hair - the length, how soft it was, the color, especially. He knew it was something unique to him, that for years people stopped to admire.

Victor liked to feel it running like a cascade on his shoulders and back as he let it loose, to make it curl on his fingers, watch it fly behind him as he watched videos of himself skating. He loved to comb it, but he also loved letting it down, regardless of whether the wind was going to mess it all up.

He even loved how Georgi inhaled his scent in their tender moments and pulled at it during their nights of burning passion as he uttered eternal vows in his body.

"Yes, yes, but ... People are talking more and more about him. I think it's past time for me to cut it."Victor didn’t even need to explain much to Georgi for him to understand what he was implying - and that saddened and infuriated him.

The world of figure skating was beautiful and cruel at the same time. In the rinks, everything was wonderful - the presentations, the smiles, the choreography, the colorful and bright clothes. However, outside the rinks, both Georgi and Victor knew of the pressure not to get away from the line, not to displease and to not fall outside the concept of both fans and judges.

It was enough for them to have their relationship being a dangerous and hidden thing - and now, as if that weren’t enough, the implication made its way to Victor's hair, once praised for its mesmerizing size and beauty. Now that he was an adult, however, the length left wrong impressions, was gossiped and whispered about in hallways, being the topic of whispered jokes among commentators who passed by before they went to their booths.

"Alright... I understand. I don’t agree, I don’t think it's fair, but... I understand. I know exactly what you mean." Victor didn’t want to cut his hair and Georgi didn’t want for that to happen, ever; however, they both knew that it was necessary.

They already knew about the examples of skaters from other times - old and recent generations, some still alive and now technicians, choreographers, anything but actual athletes- who had their careers hampered by challenging the norms of that universe and refusing to wear the required masks to get along.

If Victor didn’t adapt himself, he’d have problems for the rest of his career as a professional skater.

"I brought some things from home. You can use them." The skater commented, tapping the backpack on the floor with the side of his leg. Georgi bent down to pick it up, though not very willingly, but he honestly didn’t have the strength to send Victor off and wait for the next day for him to cut his hair in a barbershop or something.

If Victor did all that work, it was because he wanted Georgi specifically to cut his hair - he was the only person in the world who also understood the relationship he had with each of his strands.

"Okay... You can sit down, then." Georgi pulled the chair next to the desk where he left his computer and books, as well as the notebooks and drawing materials. Victor nodded, taking slow steps before sitting down, looking at his boyfriend one last time before he turned away.

"Thank you." Victor practically murmured his words, but they came out loud enough for Georgi to listen. While the skater waited in the chair, he was inspecting the things in the backpack - Victor really had prepared himself, maybe too much - until he found the pair of scissors.

He pulled it out and tried to open and close it. The blade was sharp, and it seemed to be new, as if Victor had bought a few days ago with just that purpose. As if he was already thinking of making such a decision, but it took some time before he actually developed the courage to go on with it.

Slowly and with his free hand, Georgi grabbed a lock of Victor's hair, letting it slide down his palm and fingers until he was holding only the tip. He took a deep breath, but knew that wouldn’t be enough to contain the tears that also dared to appear in his eyes and blurred his vision.

The man blinked, and they fell on his face. His hands were shaking lightly, and he sobbed for a few seconds, mourning over the situation before drawing the courage to finally begin cutting the first strands of his boyfriend's hair.

Victor also allowed himself to cry in silence at that moment. However, the fact that the person who was cutting his hair was Georgi served to comfort him; he understood his feelings, and he had combed his hair several times before the competitions, tied it in braids and ponytails, just as he had also helped him to wash and dry in the moments of privacy in which they showered together.

Sometimes it was possible to hear the quiet sobs of both, as well as occasional sniffles. Still, the silence was present between the two men, and what was most often heard was the sound of the scissors blades cutting Victor's hair, gradually diminishing it in size.

Georgi felt as if, with each strand he cut away, he was taking the strength, grace, and all of Victor's essence.

The minutes passed slowly, and with them the length of Victor's hair diminished. On the floor, the silver threads gathered, and at one point the skater took one that was on his shoulder, playing with it on his fingers.

It broke Georgi's heart. Victor was so proud to be who he was, to have his hair long like that, to skate like he had wings on his back, as if the blades on the skates were pure ornament - because with each jump it was as if he was flying.

He had never seen Victor as vulnerable as that night, sitting in front of him and letting him cut the biggest symbol of his identity in the same way that a bird gave up on its wings to get its feathers pulled so it would and never fly again.

By the time he was done, his hair was at the level of the skater's nape, and his fringe was much shorter as well. He didn’t know if Victor would like the new hairstyle - in fact, he was a little unsure of the idea of cutting someone's hair. Still, when he showed the other man the result, he just smiled, despite the redness in his nose and eyes.

They hugged each other, even though Georgi wasn’t ready to face that new Victor with short hair, gently cut with scissors and once caressed by his hands, but also violently plucked by society's expectations.

"It looks beautiful, Georgi. You're wonderful with these things." He complimented them as they parted, and Georgi just nodded, not knowing how to deal with that, let alone the weight of that change on Victor.

Before dawn, Victor left his home by the window, leaving Georgi alone amidst the silver hairs scattered around him on the floor of the room.

From that point on, their relationship suffered an even greater blow. If even Victor couldn’t keep the hairstyle he wanted, it was even harder to keep a secret relationship like theirs working; no matter how much they worshiped and no matter how good they were to each other, their circumstances didn’t help.

They tried and abused their creativity to find a way to keep their romance present without it being shown to the public. But the more they did so, the more tired they got, and within a few months they realized that it wasn’t working - and only one thing was passing inside the heads of the two skaters.

Before the season started, the two went out for a walk. It was autumn, and with every step they took in the park, they heard the breaking of leaves with the pressure of their feet. People would look at them as they passed, more to recognize them as athletes than to actually be surprised at the fact that they were walking together-  especially since they were keeping a minimum distance between their bodies until they sat on a more isolated bench where no one passed by.

"So, Georgi..." Victor began, taking a quick glance at his boyfriend. At that moment, he realized that after all these years, he also changed - his features, his look, even his posture. The juvenile innocence was long gone and has given way to a man, an artist, a silent storm unfairly ignored.

Victor wanted to kiss him, but he didn’t have enough courage to do it at that moment.

If he really was brave, he wouldn’t have even started that conversation. If he was brave and capable, just as he was on the ice, Victor wouldn’t be sad and discouraged, holding himself as to not show too much emotion and forcing himself to speak the sad, terrible thoughts, that had long been stuck in his heart.

"Yes?" Georgi asked, staring at him with his blue eyes, so dark and beautiful, to the point that the skater had to look away momentarily so he could speak again - and he did not know if that act was, at that moment, courage or cowardice.

"I ... Can I say something important to you? And that I think will upset you?" Victor waited for some more dramatic reaction, but Georgi only looked at him with a melancholic air before nodding, saying a "sure" in response.

The seconds passed before Victor opened his mouth again.

"I think we should break up." Those words burned and ripped at his throat as they uttered, hurting him more than he thought they would when he caught himself imagining the moment in his head, in several different scenarios.

Georgi would have been lying if he said he hadn’t imagined that day would never come - indeed, in recent times he could feel the shadow of the end approaching him, and now it was there, swallowing him along with Victor. He could see it in the sad look of the other skater, in his serious posture, with his hands clasped in his lap - hands that he wanted so badly to hold as he told him that he was fine, that he understood, that he still loved him.

But he couldn’t bring himself to do it.

Like Victor, Georgi was afraid too. Out of the skating clothes and without the blades at his feet, he was just a man full of weaknesses and insecurities, frighteningly human.

It was this crude, faulty, and scary humanity that consumed the feelings of both athletes.

"I agree." These were the only words he was able to utter, and as much as he accepted the decision and understood all the motives behind it, it was still deeply unfair, revolting, and tragic.

Victor and Georgi, in that world, were fated not to live a fairy tale, but doomed and tied to a tragic love story; there was no magic to make things easy, monsters to be defeated, white horses for them to ride together in an rushed flight, far away to a secluded place hidden from the rest of the world where they could be happy.

All that was between them was the craving for an intense but forbidden passion, the fire of fear in their hearts, and the insecurity that was advancing and taking over each step of them with more force each day.

Skaters are owners of glass hearts, and Victor and Georgi's were one step away from shattering.

Victor took one last look at the face of his now ex boyfriend, trying to memorize every detail: the curve of his nose, the shape of his lips, the eyelashes that adorned his eyes. The face that one day he stroked and kissed so much, but that would no longer receive such touches of his, even if unwillingly so.

With heavy legs, he stood up.

"I’ll see you in the rink." Those were the only words of farewell that he managed to speak, when so many others were stuck in his throat, trapped, struggling to leave.

Victor wanted to look at Georgi once more and say that he really enjoyed the time they spent together, that he had fun dating the other man even in his teenage years, that he learned so much with him and how much he admired him as an athlete - and, that he deserved much more than what he received.

However, Georgi knew all of that. It wasn’t like, after all that time together, he needed to vocalize his thoughts so he could understand the messages between the lines.

"Equally." He said, and then he stood up as well, looking at Victor before the two of them started to walk, each to one side, now to follow their paths no longer as a couple, but as individuals.

Since then, they have been rediscovering themselves in the skating rinks, swallowing the pains and turning them into the flame of a new sports rivalry. Every day, they skated and sought to improve more and more - with faster spins, cleaner jumps, more complex choreographies.

On the ice, the lines left by their skates intersected when they could no longer hold hands. On the ice, they recounted the story that only they knew, with their ups and downs, encounters and farewells, joys and fears.

In the ice, Victor and Georgi were rivals, at least in the eyes of others. Two rival and opposing forces, crashing waves, each seeking to swallow the other. Victor was the lightness of a spring day, the warm, sweet memories of childhood albums, the softness of a sea breeze. Georgi was the cold of the rain, the bittersweet of nostalgia, the hurricane of gestured feelings.

On the ice, they met. On the ice, they were bound to face each other, to live a bond of rivalry and to compete for points and medals, for centralized spins, for impeccable quadruples and intense programs, for the applause and surprised gasps of the audience, for the focus of the cameras that followed their movements.

Deep within their hearts, however, they wanted to live on an equal footing not as opposing forces but rather as the mixture of paints, which together formed a single color.

That, however, was not the reality that they were fated to live. All they had was the public's expectations and the sickly burning in their hearts, a fever that would never go away through the rest of their lives as long as they remained in that world of fabricated stories, bright colored clothes and sharp blades.

In the world of figure skating, sacrifices are need to be made.

**Author's Note:**

> This is basically my holy trinity: fluff, smut and angst. What a wild ride.
> 
> It broke my heart to do this with those two, I swear. I'm so sorry, but the angst was calling me. I had to.
> 
> I hope you liked it!


End file.
